“Sometimes it's possible to make no mistakes and still lose. It is not a weakness. It is life.”
Captain Jean-Luc Picard, Star Trek: The Next Generation
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Chris reviews The Dark Knight

The Dark Knight was very, very good. Very grim, like any good Batman story should be, and ends with the perfect mixture of hope and awfulness, just like the best Batman comics do. It won't exactly leave you feeling good, but then again, it's not supposed to. It's not a happy, feel-good movie. It's a dark, intelligent, story about three men pushed to the edge of sanity by another man who's already gone over.

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July 20th, 2008 by Chris | 38 Comments »

Indiana Jones And The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull

I went.

I saw.

I reviewed.

 

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July 10th, 2008 by Chris | 17 Comments »

Action Figure Makeover: The Thing

Today's article is brought to us by the lovely and talented Miss Victoria Whitby, better known to the internet as Mystie, who rules over the magical realm of Crown Combo with a firm but benevolent hand. Mystie is a Berks County, Pennsylvania native, international lady of mystery, world renown raconteur, New York Times bestselling author of Sex, Leather, Candy and Pain: The Unauthorized Biography Of Funshine Bear, and inventor of the award winning Mystaphalon non-stick cookware. In her spare time she enjoys reading, quiet nude walks on non-nude beaches, and Action Figure Makeovers™, where she takes boys’ toys and girly-izes them with pink nail polish and glitter. Today's victim: The Thing. 

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June 6th, 2008 by Mystie | 68 Comments »

Indiana Jones was [AWESOME!/TOTAL CRAP.]

Instead of waiting until I've seen the movie, I've decided to pre-review it so that you can come to The Sci-Fi Guys and get generic reviews that tell you nothing whatsoever about the film, just like every other "professional" movie reviewer in the world has already written. I'll go back and have an opinion later, once I've actually seen it. You know, 'cause I gots me some integrities all up in this mutha. Click the pic to come on in and see why I thought Indiana Jones And The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull [totally rocked/sucked monkey balls.]

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May 22nd, 2008 by Chris | 24 Comments »

Chris reviews Cloverfield

poster-thumb1.jpgSince the DVD comes out tomorrow, I figured I should get off my ass and finally post this review I've been sitting on. I give Cloverfield a 6 out of 10. That's three out of five stars, or a thumbs up on the Siskel & Ebert scale. I know their final score is the one piece of info reviewers usually save for the end of the review, but you need to know up front that Cloverfield is not really a horrible movie, despite the MANY negative things I'm going to say about it. Click the pic to hear the scoop. SPOILERS AHEAD: Consider yourselves warned.

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April 21st, 2008 by Chris | 35 Comments »

Chris is going to pee himself over The X-Files

xfiles_teaserposter_thumb.jpgThe movie poster for The X-Files sequel has finally been released, and brought to us courtesy of DanM. In light of this, I've decided to gather all the info we have so far and put it into one place, including some brand new, and quite frankly INCREDIBLY disappointing info on the film. Click if the pic to get the skinny. 

BREAKING NEWS! - The X-Files sequel finally has a name: The X-Files: I Want To Believe. More inside!

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April 1st, 2008 by Chris | 54 Comments »

Thanks for the good times, Gary.

gary31.jpg
Ernest Gary Gygax
July 27, 1938 – March 4, 2008
 

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March 4th, 2008 by Chris | 78 Comments »

“It’s Groundhog Day!”

gdposter2.jpgOkay, campers, rise and shine, and don't forget your booties 'cause it's cold out there today. It's cold out there every day; what is this, Miami Beach? Not hardly! And you know you can expect hazardous travel later today with that, you know, that, uh, that blizzard thing. The National Weather Service is calling for a "big blizzard thing!" Yes, they are. But you know, there's another reason why today is especially exciting. The big question on everybody's lips, their chapped lips: do ya think Phil is gonna come out and see his shadow? Punxsutawney Phil! That's right, woodchuck chuckers, it's Groundhog Day! And to celebrate, The Sci-Fi Guys give you our first ever SALUTE TO TIME LOOPS!

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February 2nd, 2008 by Chris | 109 Comments »

WANT TO BE A MOVIE STAR?

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The truth of human nature is this: some people want to be rich, some people want to be famous, and some people want to be idolized. But how badly do they want it? In my first major project outside of The Sci-Fi Guys, I'm co-directing an independent film. The premise is simple; myself and my two accomplices are going to make three people movie stars… but not just any three people. We're only taking the three people who want it the most. Interested? Click the pic to see how you can put yourself in the limelight.

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January 25th, 2008 by Chris | 2 Comments »

Chris Says Goodbye To Christmas 2007

vader-claus-02.jpgThe jingle bells have stopped jingling, the hos have all been hoed, and the trees are either boxed up or thrown out to the curb. The holidays are over. And what are we left with? I'll tell you what we're left with - PRESENTS! I can't believe nobody's posted anything about this yet, so I'll start. WHAT THE HELL DID YOU GUYS GET FOR CHRISTMAS??

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January 9th, 2008 by Chris | 46 Comments »
Indeed!